a love letter from zelda to f. scott fitzgerald
Sweetheart,
Please, please don't be so depressed--We'll be married soon, and then these lonesome nights will be over forever--and until we are, I am loving, loving every tiny minute of the day and night. Maybe you won't understand this, but sometimes when I miss you most, it's hardest to write--and you always know when I make myself--just the ache of it all--and I can't tell you. If we were together, you'd feel how strong it is--you're so sweet when you're melancholy. I love your sad tenderness--when I've hurt you--that's one of the reasons I could never be sorry for our quarrels, and they bothered you so. Those dear, dear little fusses, when I always tried so hard to make you kiss and forget.
Scott, there's nothing in all the world I want but you and your precious love. All the material things are nothing. I'd just hate to live a sordid, colorless existence-because you'd soon love me less--and less--and I'd do anything--anything--to keep your heart for my own--I don't want to live--I want to love first, and live incidentally...
Don't--don't ever think of the things you can't give me--You've trusted me with the dearest heart of all--and it's so damn much more than anybody else in all the world has ever had. How can you think deliberately of life without me--If you should die...
O Darling--darling Scott--It'd be like going blind...I'd have no purpose in life--just a pretty--decoration. Don't you think I was made for you? I feel like you had me ordered--and I was delivered to you--to be worn--I want you to wear me, like a watch--charm or a button hole bouquet--to the world. And then, when we're alone, I want to help--to know that you can't do anything without me...
All my heart-- I love you.
No comments:
Post a Comment